"A chance to give something back..."
Our supported lodgings service, Heart and Home, comprises a network of hosts across Norfolk and Suffolk who offer a bedroom, support and empathy to young people between the ages of 16 and 18. Hear from Lawrence and Janine, hosts who worked with The Benjamin Foundation since 2016.
What motivated you to become hosts?
“Having brought up four between us, we really felt we had experience to offer and felt strongly that we wanted to give something back. It felt less of a commitment than fostering but a full and meaningful commitment, nonetheless.”
How do you build trust with a young person?
“We keep honest, level and consistent. We aren’t pushy but available on their terms when they need us. We offer meals and support but don’t insist on including them in day-to-day and family activities can keep light-hearted whenever we can. We are not patronising but respectful, acknowledging they are an adult (or almost) and try hard not to judge them.”
What have you learned about other cultures, backgrounds, or life experiences through hosting?
“We have really seen first-hand how damaging early childhood experiences can be. The impact goes so deep and comes out in such varied ways. We cannot imagine how terrible it must feel to not have the support of a stable long-term network. This is what has really struck us hard over the 10 years. “
Our staff work with hosts to ensure that they have the skills and experience needed to support young people and help deliver stability on their journey to independence.
How do you think your home environment helps a young person feel safe and supported?
“I think the fact we are here, have routines and respect the young person’s own space (e.g. not entering room without permission).
We are a calm and happy household (and have cats!) I do wonder if seeing our own children choosing to spend time here (along with previous young people we have hosted) might also add to them feeling safe.”
Looking back, what are you most proud of as a host?
“We have stuck with it each time, been very committed and never got angry or upset with the young person. We are proud that we have hopefully made a small difference somehow.”
What’s one story or memory that sums up your experience?
“We have watched our first young person grow and become a mother herself. She came with her new little family to our wedding, and she describes us as her “safe place” which sums it all up for us.”
In a sentence or two, how would you describe what hosting means to you?
“A chance to give something back.”